How Can I Help My Tabby Cats Get Along Better? (Vet Answered)

Hi Becca,

Thanks for writing in.

It's really hard when you have this sort of friction in the house, particularly when we can't understand where it's coming from.

One thing I'm going to recommend is that you do get Fluffanutter (I love this name by the way!) checked by your vet to make sure there are no medical issues that could be contributing to what's going on here. Unfortunately, cats can be quite unsympathetic to each other in illness, and have been known to bully cats that are unwell, so it would be sensible to make sure she is fit and healthy.

One of the biggest mistakes humans often make with cats is trying to intervene too much in feline politics.

Obviously, we don't want this bullying to continue indefinitely, but when we interrupt conflict, it often doesn't fix it; it just delays the conflict resolution. So sometimes letting it come to a head, provided that it doesn't get dangerous or violent, is actually the best thing to do.

It's often tempting for us to pay special attention and give extra affection and fuss to the cat that's being bullied, but this can actually lead to more friction by causing confusion within their dynamic. So it is important to observe their interactions and respect any established hierarchies and groups.

There are a few things that you can do to try to create a calmer environment:

• Make sure that there are lots of different litter boxes around, including at least one or two open-top litter boxes. Enclosed litter boxes are popular because obviously they keep a lot of the mess and smell inside, and it might seem like cats would appreciate the privacy, but it actually gives the other cats an opportunity to ambush the one in the box as they're coming out. An open-top litter box allows your cat to keep an eye on their surroundings whilst they're 'indisposed', and it takes away that opportunity for these bully boys to attack her when she's finished.

• Make sure that there are different spots up high, or little hidey holes where she can just take a break and get away from these bullies.

• There are a lot of different calming products out there; some are specifically designed for multi-cat households, some are based on pheromones, whereas others are based on more calming herbs. So even if you have tried one, I would suggest having a bit of a look and maybe trying a few more before we give up on that entirely.

The main message here is to make sure that she's got plenty of space that she can escape to, remove opportunities for ambush, and avoid trying to 'force' them to get along. Some cats form close-knit social groups, but in some cases, polite cohabitation is the best outcome.

I really hope that helps.

Dr Karyn